Man, the first time I saw a horror poster that didn't just scream “jump scare,” I was hooked. “Weapons” is doing that now—four posters deep—and I'm both intrigued and scratching my head. From the director of “Barbarian,” Zach Cregger, this thing's set to hit theaters August 8. That's the date to circle, folks. No festival buzz yet, just a slow-burn marketing rollout that's got me wondering if it'll pay off.
Back in April, they dropped a 45-second teaser online. Cryptic as hell—kids vanishing, no explanation. Then, a 2-minute trailer a few weeks later, still leaving me guessing. Warners isn't rushing this, and I respect that… or maybe I'm just tired of being spoon-fed plots. The latest move? Two-plus hours of security cam footage on an unlisted YouTube channel—disappeared kids, a creepy man's reflection at the 2:14:26 mark. What is this, a scavenger hunt?
These posters, though. The newest one's a grid of childlike drawings—crossed-out faces, a can of chicken soup, a bell, a bonsai tree. “The most harmless things can hurt you,” it taunts. The others lean into that eerie vibe: kids running into the night, a handwritten note about a 2:17 AM disappearance. It's “Blair Witch” meets “Cloverfield”—that old-school viral tease. Someone on X said it feels like a middle school art project gone wrong, and yeah, that tracks. Shot during what looks like allergy season, too—those red eyes on the kids aren't helping.
I remember loving this kind of mystery in the ‘90s. Now? It's like homework—am I supposed to solve it before August 8? Critics are buzzing, fans are theorizing, and Warners is clearly channeling Neon's “Longlegs” playbook. A sharp quote from a trade piece stuck with me: “Cregger's building a puzzle, not a movie.” Fair. The plot—kids waking up, walking out, never coming back—hints at something sinister beneath the mundane. A bonsai tree as a weapon? Sure, why not.
I laughed at the absurdity. Then I sighed, imagining the budget for all this footage. Then—pizza delivery. Is it genius? Maybe. Will it flop? Possibly. No payoff yet, no tension, just… questions. Reminds me of that weird rave scene in “The Matrix”—not the cool part. And that's the thing. Or not. I don't know anymore.
Header image idea: A wide shot of Cregger on set, overlaid with the bonsai tree poster—dark, moody, unpolished.
