Michael Jai White Tries to Chill. Hollywood Doesn't Let Him.
There's a moment in the Hostile Takeover trailer where Michael Jai White, as legendary assassin Pete Strykyr, earnestly says he just needed “a safe space to work through his feelings.” And honestly? I kind of believed him—right before someone's head slammed into a filing cabinet.
Because that's the tone here. Violence wrapped in self-help jargon. John Wick filtered through a corporate HR seminar. It's like someone dared a screenwriter to blend Fight Club, Burn After Reading, and a Groupon anger management session into one of those low-budget actioners you end up watching on a Tuesday night when the Wi-Fi cuts out.
And somehow… it kind of works.
The Plot (aka “Don't Think Too Hard”)
Pete Strykyr is the best in the business—until he makes the tragic mistake of going to therapy. Or technically, to “Workaholics Anonymous,” which is apparently a red flag in the murder-for-hire industry. His employer, a crime syndicate boss with trust issues, assumes he's cracking. So they send a who's-who of contract killers after him.
Cue the bloodbath.
Fists fly. Bullets spray. Emotional breakthroughs? Maybe. But mostly broken ribs.
There's a bit of Crank-level madness here, except less amphetamines and more existential dread. Think action scenes that feel like stress dreams—confusing, sweaty, and weirdly cathartic.
Who Made This and Why?
Directed by Michael Hamilton-Wright (yes, The Mangler 2 guy—deep cut), Hostile Takeover is, by all signs, a “lean-into-the-chaos” kind of project. He co-wrote it with Burton L. Warner and pulled together a cast that includes Aimee Stolte, Aleks Paunovic, and Dawn Olivieri—all actors who know how to sell absurdity with a straight face.
Quiver Distribution is dropping this one in select U.S. theaters and on VOD on August 8th, 2025. Which feels right. This isn't a “gather the family” kind of movie. It's more of a “watch this while rage-eating chips in your underwear at midnight” kind of movie.
And Let's Talk About That Tone…
The trailer really wants you to know it's “fun.” Hyper-stylized camera moves, freeze-frames, slo-mo headshots, ironic needle drops. There's even a visual gag where Pete might be fighting someone in a wellness seminar. Which… yeah. We're officially post-sincerity.
At the same time, it's hard to tell whether the movie's in on its own joke. Is this a clever satire of burnout culture and toxic masculinity? Or just another excuse for bone-crunching fight choreography and snarky one-liners?
Honestly—I don't care. If it delivers a few inventive kills, a memorable twist, and some unhinged energy, that's already more than I got from Expendables 4.
Bottom Line?
Hostile Takeover might be junk. But if it is, it looks like the kind of junk made by people who actually had fun putting it together. There's something weirdly charming about its unpretentious chaos. Like a direct-to-video bruiser that knows it's not prestige, but still wants to leave a bruise.
So yeah. I'll probably watch it. Maybe even twice if it's bad enough in the right way.
But let me ask you this— When did action movies become therapy sessions with body counts?
