KISS, Jonas, and McG Walk Into a Glitter Bomb—Hollywood Didn't Flinch
Nick Jonas just agreed to strap on face paint, platform boots, and take a turn as KISS's Paul Stanley in the new biopic “Shout It Out Loud”—and the internet is SCREAMING so hard Gene Simmons might sue for copyright infringement. That's right: McG, Hollywood's resident adrenaline junkie (the Charlie's Angels maestro who nearly vaporized the Terminator franchise), is directing this thing. The twist? Jonas will actually sing—he's cramming in vocal training now to channel Stanley's glass-shattering falsetto. Oh, and someone's about to get blacklisted for using this much lens flare.
Why This Isn't Your Grandpa's Biopic—And Might Actually Melt Your Eyeballs
Let's break it down. The combo is so absurd it's electric: Nick Jonas, fresh off Broadway hits and monster blockbusters (Jumanji), breathing life into a glitter rock demigod whose real-life origin story is half “Rise to Fame,” half “Monster Movie.” Fully financed by STX, “Shout It Out Loud” goes to camera later this year or in early 2026, and the casting process for Gene Simmons—yes, the fire-breathing, bass-slapping Israeli export with more ego than KISS makeup—is still a fever dream. Insane detail: Jonas will replicate Stanley's actual vocals, not lip-sync, putting his pipes through rock-and-roll bootcamp. Expect more slow-motion pyrotechnics than in a Michael Bay sizzle reel.
Savage comparison time: This isn't Bohemian Rhapsody. This is Walk the Line with face paint and blood capsules, directed by a guy best known for turning explosions into a visual language. If Baz Luhrmann's Elvis was the wedding, McG's KISS is the afterparty that gets raided by the police.
Unmasking the Wild Backstory—And Why It Matters
Pause: Have we seen this midlife franchise chaos before? Try Rocketman's Elton-zilla, or Straight Outta Compton's mythmaking. But this is nuttier—KISS's origin involves Stanley's childhood injuries fueling his outsider drive (“short, fat, deaf in one ear”), and Simmons ditching yeshiva for rock's forbidden fruit. Anonymous studio whisper? “If McG adds a slow-mo bass solo, I'm moving to Canada.”
The film's been marinating for years, with everyone from Universal Music to Pophouse involved—in other words, every exec who ever air-guitared to “Rock and Roll All Nite” now has a producer credit. The difference: This isn't just IP mining, it's glam chaos, with Jonas doing his own singing and a director allergic to subtlety.
Pick a Side—Is This Cursed Genius or Cataclysmic Garbage?
Would you rather watch this—Nick Jonas resurrecting Paul Stanley under McG's neon sledgehammer—or burn $20 in protest at your local dive bar? No judgment. (Actually, a lot of judgment.)
